Pockets of Time
thoughts on summer days without my phone, chickens, and quiet moments
“Battery Empty.” The red camera blinks at me before shutting off.
“Oh.” I say slowly to myself. “Guess I won’t be taking pictures.”
Five weeks of not using my cell phone and I’ve not missed it-- except in moments like this. I’ve been meaning for days to step outside with the camera and take a few updated shots of our chickens in the chicken tractors and now when I finally do, I find that the camera needs to be charged. The chickens will keep doing their thing whether I photograph them or not but there’s something picturesque about the way the chicken tractors sit opposite each other on each side of the driveway.
If you don’t know what a chicken tractor is, imagine a tiny screened-in house, with a short, hinged door on one end, and a 5-gallon bucket hanging on the back end, attached to a small hose for a watering system. For rain and sun shelter, a tarp covers the sides. A narrow feeding trough hangs low in the middle of each tractor, holding the day’s food. Each tractor comfortably holds 25 birds. My husband attaches two wheels on the back end once or twice a day, lifts the front with a rope, and rolls it to its new patch of grass. There they’ll enjoy new families of bugs and worms, and fresh grass to poop on.
This morning, golden corn tassels wave lightly in the field nearby and the sun catches the ends of white chicken feathers, making these unattractive birds look somewhat charming. From where I stand, anyway. (If you’ve raised meat birds, then you know.)
In leu of being camera-ready, I’m forced to take it in slowly and thoughtfully. It’s quieter than usual, as six of my kids are eating oatmeal at picnic table out back, and the baby is sleeping.
The phone is off, the camera battery dead, but in this moment, I feel very much alive.
Every day there’s an enforced “quiet time” at the Pfenning house. Have you read the sweet children’s book “The Napping House” by Audrey Wood? On the cover is a picture of a snoring granny, a dog, a cat, a child, a mouse, and a “wakeful flea” …am I forgetting any?
The story begins with, “There is a house, a napping house, where everyone is sleeping.”
Soon after lunchtime, I send all children outside who are not sleeping. When someone inevitably tries to come back in after 10 minutes I say, “Nope, this is a napping house. Are you coming in to take a nap?” Naps are always allowed here.
There’s no screentime for the kids and in fact they don’t really “do screens” at all unless you count the occasional family movie night or geography quiz with Grandma. My kids are aged 10, 8, 7, 5, 3, 2, and 3 months. In their downtime you might find them coloring outside, dragging “treasures” out of Daddy’s scrap metal trailer (they’re really not supposed to do this) playing house, climbing trees, swimming in our pool, biking, or reading a book. Nine times out of ten for my oldest kids, it’s reading a book.
On an ideal day, I have an undisturbed chunk of quiet time all to myself during The Napping House hours. Littles one sleep, while big kids entertain themselves outside. In reality though, that kind of planned alone time doesn’t happen much. This isn’t to complain-- it’s just life right now with this many young children.
What I do have in this season of life, are pockets of time. A pocket here for a few dishes before my toddler comes to me with blue marker on her legs. Another pocket where children are playing nicely together, and I get a chance to sit down with my coffee. A pocket of time later on for a phone chat with my sister.
Before my phone’s summer siesta began, those pockets were largely spent on my phone, or trying hard not to be on my phone. There never seemed to be enough time for creative pursuits. My idea of rest was falling asleep in my chair, Bluetooth headphones on while an audiobook played, or phone dropped mid-YouTube video.
I don’t let my kids spend their quiet time on screens because I’m convinced it’s not restful at all. And there I was— phone following me outside, in the car, in the bathroom, and to my bed at night.
I was seeing my kids live a very interesting and creative life, and watching YouTube influencers also live these very interesting lives. And where was I? Feeling stuck in my recliner for the 100th nursing session that day.
Yesterday, during a pocket of time, I sketched a bouquet of flowers. Nobody needed me, and kids were playing outside. I didn’t have any pressing housework at that moment, and I was too tired to start any meal prep. Six weeks ago, I would have pulled out the easiest nearest thing: my phone.
I would have scrolled. YouTube, Substack Notes, text messages, my photo app. Anything. Anything to fill the pocket of time and numb out for a bit.
With that not being an option this time, I grabbed a blank sheet of paper, and reached for the nearest pen. Flowers. Ah, I love flowers. My husband surprised me with a bouquet of farm fresh flowers last week and though many were wilted now, I was remembering how beautiful they looked that first day. I started to sketch a vase, then flowers for the vase, and a table for them to be set on. I looked at the sketch before me and was stunned, but not by my artistic abilities.
When was the last time I’ve drawn anything like this, just for fun?
My daughter came inside shortly after I drew the flowers, and she went “Wow! Did you draw this?” When I had finished with that and was on to the next thing, she started adding to my drawing. Soon it became “our drawing,” as there were now windows and a calendar drawn in behind the flowers and table. She even drew a running deer on her calendar page, just like the calendar shows on our kitchen wall.
This evening, I put the youngest four to bed. Normally, everyone sort of goes to bed at the same time and it’s chaotic and loud. Today, as usual, it was chaotic and loud, but I felt this nudge to do something a little different. Tonight, I ended up doing some drawing practice with my oldest two while we listened to an audiobook (Anne of Green Gables) on my new CD player. Within the span of an hour, we had each filled at least one page with adorable doodles and were quite proud of our work.
I can’t say that putting my phone away has resulted in anything major these last few weeks. I still haven’t started exercising like I keep promising myself, I can’t seem to get to bed at a decent hour, and kids have still left their shoes at home when we’ve driven to town for the library. Some things continue to be a struggle, smart phones or not.
What I can say is that without my phone I have enjoyed a few more moments to stare at ugly chickens, a few more moments to laugh at silly things my toddler is saying, and a few more restful pockets of time.
And that seems to be enough: enough reason to keep the phone in its place, and out of my pockets.
Take a bike ride on a nice day or read a book at bed time.